Cynic

Yeah. That's right. I consider myself a cynical person. My dark sense of humor has ironically been the only light at the end of my otherwise dismal tunnel. This way of thinking has been the only way I've stayed sane-ish for 31 years.
It's easy for me to see the glass half empty, keep the curtains drawn and the doors locked. I love rainy days and dark movie theaters. And why shouldn't I?
Some people say I'm a pessimist. I like to think of myself as a realist.
Reality keeps me from the dangerous fantasies that are made for movies and books and People magazine.
I'm a real person with real problems living a very real life. And I'd like to acknowledge the other people out there who share similar feelings. Cheers to you.
I often wish/ed that I was one of these people who was footloose and fancy free. Carefree and happy-go-lucky. I envy these people. I always wonder what it must be like to be in their heads, shoes, lives. Are they on Prozac? Is that their answer? Or are these people genuinely excited about life and all it's grand adventures?
I hear and read often that we should be thankful for everything we have. That we are not in a terminally ill state, have all our working parts and are for the most part of sound and sane mind.
I understand this concept. Completely. Except it seems very hard for me to grasp at the same time. Being the pessimist I am and all. My problems however disproportionate in scale are still my own and will at some point in time need to be worked out by someone. Chances are that someone will be me.
Possibly...probably in a dark movie theater somewhere on a rainy day.